Archives for July 2008

At approximately age 6, I can remember following a recipe for “CANDLE SALAD” consisting of a pineapple, banana, and a maraschino cherry on a lettuce lettuce leaf.  The recipe was even simpler than the picture, as I think I stuck the cherry to the banana with a toothpick–none of that white stuff.  My family oohed and aahhhed and I was plain stinkin’ proud of my creation. (WHAT IN THE WORLD??!?!)

The next recipe attempt was years later–I would have been about 9.  I devoured an Orange Julius smoothie at my neighbor’s and thought I’d gone to sweet tooth heaven.  I begged for the recipe & furiously scribbled it down on a green memo note, then ran it back home to share my treasure with my mother. (notice that it is so old, it is no longer green.  Also take note of how I wrote my a’s at the time.  I obviously had arrived at coolness.)

So I thought I’d recreate the recipe for you because I had leftover orange juice concentrate from a dinner recipe.
Ingredients:

 In a blender, pour 3/4 of a cup of orange juice concentrate. (It calls for a 6 oz can, but do they even make 6 oz cans anymore?)

1/2 cup of milk

1/2 cup of sugar (It’s no wonder why i liked this so much!)

Add Ice Cubes (2ish-3ish cups.  However you like it, really)

Add  1 1/2 cups cold water.

 Blend.  (Make sure your hand looks enormous and deformed before taking pictures.)

Enjoy & make sure you take a picture of your husband drinking it with as goofy of a face as possible.  Insist that  he retake the photo until his face looks just like an advertisement.

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NOW FOR ANYONE WHO IS A FAN OF THE PIONEER WOMAN, PLEASE KEEP READING.  If you have no clue who she is, check her site out and if you win any of her give aways, you are obligated to send me money .  You are now dismissed.  If you ARE a fan, like moi, the rest of this post is for you.  I hope you enjoyed the recipe, but I had to laugh. 

Here is why I am most definitely NOT the Pioneer Woman:

1.  My ingredients are all generic–Kroger this, Meijer that. No top-notch ingredients for me.
2. I have to crop all my pictures because there is about 1 square foot of counter space in my kitchen–If I left them as-is, I would have confused you with the crockpot and dishes that were drying in the sink–you may have tried to throw this recipe in a crock pot or would have been jealous of my plasticware.
3.  My “Hey look at me, I have Pioneer Woman’s” Blender broke when I recently dropped the glass part and shattered it (while reaching behind it in my cupboard for ingredients to make an unneeded s’more-oink, oink).

4.  I used ‘ish‘ in my measurements.  Look, this is not rocket science, and I am no cook.
5.  I forgot an ingredient in my “Cast of Characters” picture.  Notice: Water is missing.  I had to milk the cow for it first & forgot to include it orrrrrrrrrr I’m scatterbrained; take your pick.
6. I put the final product in a plastic blue dinner cup, rather than a fancy, assorted wine or martini glass. “Presentation is Everything.” Sigh.

And that my friends, is why I’m no PW.  I’ll do better next time.