Trinkets of Thought

A Kitchen Disasterpiece

March 5, 2010 by Maren 12 Comments

Last night was a ‘kitchen fail’ of epic proportions. I purposed to make delicious mushroom crepes like the ones I had eaten at a French American restaurant in Cincinnati.

{Important to know for this story: I extremely dislike wasting food. A few weeks ago, I sent Michael to the grocery store for a few ingredients. I asked for canned spaghetti sauce and fresh spinach. He returned with CANNED spinach????}

I followed the recipe and slaved away in the kitchen. The recipe called for fresh spinach & I had a BRILLIANT ‘non-wasting food’ idea. Because I hate to waste, I decided to substitute canned spinach for my fresh spinach. After all, it was just SPINACH… As I stirred the canned spinach into the filling, it quickly became the most unappetizing puke-like substance I had ever seen. I knew instantly that it was a mistake-but a mistake to which I was committed. As my mom would say, it was ‘nastifying.’

I finished making the actual crepe part of the project and took a taste. Disappointment. I’d made breakfast pancakes wrapped around spinach sludge…It was doubtful, but perhaps the recipe’s lemony egg sauce drizzled over the crepes would magically tie it together? I completed my master disasterpiece.

Michael came home and I served him the disgusting delicacy. Halfway through his meal, I looked over. The look on his face can be likened to a 7 year-old who’d just been forced to eat his overcooked, greenish-brown broccoli. Sheer agony. I rescued him from the disaster (but not before a few tears…).

I suppose I can look on the bright side. At least this was just the SECOND worse dish I’ve ever made. The worst-dish winner? Spam casserole.

SO…what is YOUR worst kitchen disaster???

A Gift for my Fun-Guy

March 3, 2010 by Maren 14 Comments

For Valentine’s Day, I gave my Michael the best gift I’ve ever given someone: a moldy box of fungus. For years, Michael has dreamt of being a shiitake mushroom farmer. This Valentine’s Day, he became one. Well, nothing close to the magnitude of his dreams. But, seeing his excitement over a goofy mushroom log has given me great joy. It was worth every single penny.

I ordered a shiitake mushroom growing kit online and it arrived a couple of weeks later.

To grow the mushrooms, first, a sterile bucket is needed.

Then, you let little guy play in the bucket–good thing it was sterilized!

Then you soak the moldy looking log in the bucket.

And make sure it remains moist during the growing process.

It’s important that it remains covered with a humidity tent while the mushrooms are beginning.

Before you know it, there are lots of fungi to enjoy.

The website from which I got it touts it as a “GREAT GIFT FOR SOMEONE WHO HAS EVERYTHING.” While perhaps the individual with EVERYTHING may not desire a moldy log, I definitely know that this was the absolute perfect gift for a spouse who fancies himself as a world-renowned shiitake mushroom farmer.

Thankful for the fun-guy in my life, (sorry couldn’t resist…)

Maren

No Toys Needed

February 25, 2010 by Maren 7 Comments

Ten months into this thing called parenting, I’ve come to the conclusion that toys aren’t needed:

I scatter the toys over the living room floor and shake the rattle incessantly. He crawls for the remote. I replace the remote with plastic keys, shaking to entice. He sees my necklace and reaches his chubby fingers to make it his. I remove my necklace. I reach for the nearest stuffed animal to distract him. He claps. But could not care less about the plush pig I offer.

He crawls away. Just when I think he’s headed for a toy, he makes the dog’s bed his recliner. I let him revel in the moment of victory, then go replace the dog bed with a jack-in-the box. I crank the toy. Little one is remotely interested until he spies the dog whom he forgot about chasing. Jack is ignored.

Into the kitchen he crawls with aspirations of pulling the canine’s tail. He spies the plant and diverts course. Dirt, his favorite! I intercept & avert. I scrounge for something tempting in the kitchen’s drawers & dangle the found spatula in his face. At least, THIS is more interesting than a toy. But only until he remembers about the dog’s tail. Off he goes.

He spies the belt stool that looks interesting. He stops to investigate.

I move him back to the center of the living room floor and shake the rattle incessantly. He crawls for the remote…(Please go back to the beginning of this story to continue reading my daily, sometimes ‘by the minute’ cycle..then repeat.)

From the Land of The Sniffles…

February 24, 2010 by Maren 9 Comments

From the Land of The Sniffles, I present you with one teething baby, 458 gallons of drool, a teething fever, surprise sneezes for those even half-heartedly interested, a continuously growing email inbox that I can’t maintain, and one perpetually self-depleting toy box. (Side note: Why is it that I find myself refilling the toy box one hundred times a day? Can’t someone invent a Roomba in which its sole purpose is returning the toys back to their proper location? Can’t I hire a ‘Toy Picker Upper?’ or is that just another pseudonym for ‘MOM?’)

Amidst our sniffles, sneezes and snoozes this week, little guy has had quite the week-He has learned to crawl, pull up, & praise himself all in an eight-day span!!

Please pardon the high-pitched, annoying parental praises.

He’s still working on the pulling up, but he’s got the gist! This was his second time ever!

Yeah, Pierson!

I’m still waiting for my pair of Dorothy’s red slippers, Mary Poppin’s mystical upholstered bag, or some of Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle’s magical powder to fix our sniffles & clean the house’s insane amount of scattered toys. But for now, I’ll happily settle for these major milestones as they bring warmth to my lil’ heart & a smile on my face (while I simultaneously blow my nose with a tissue).

Anxiously anticipating a sneeze-free day in my future,

Maren

P.S. Totally unrelated: I just updated my 365 project. (You can click the link itself or the button to the right if you’re interested in taking a peek.)

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