Shelley…this one’s for you!
Living the life of an absolute clutz is a feat left only to the bravest of the brave. Yes, folks, I’m talking about myself. It takes extreme talent to be the clutz that I am. Often, I’ll find myself stumbling over nothing in particular, missing my mouth while eating or drinking, and spilling stuff just because because I get in its way. Often times this makes me laugh a bit too loudly because I find it extremely inconceivable just how graceless I can be.
A little background: Thanks to a friend of mine, she got me started on blended salads (a smoothie with lettuce and spinach in it for nutrients). They’re a good way to take in some extra nutrients, and they are a lot better than I had ever speculated. They look terrible, but when it comes to taste, I’ve come to enjoy them, and I eat them many days for lunch…
SO….Today: I had brought one for lunch. I usually put it in a Nalgene bottle, and will shake it up before consumption. I shook it up, and opened the lid. I took my first drink. Completely forgetting the fact that I had JUST taken a drink from the now-opened container, I started the process of SHAKING it again—with force. Let me just say…Oops. BLENDED SALAD WENT EVERYWHERE. The major disadvantage to a blended salad is that not only does it sound unappealling, but it looks unappetizing! I’m afraid to say that it’s appearance is more akin to something you would squeeze from a puppy dog, rather than a delicious drink. (BTW:Because of how they look and sound, I was the biggest unbeliever until I had one.) So, now, I quickly realized that my desk, my computer, my shirt and my pants were COVERED in the green smoothie mixture. I don’t like to market the fact that I drink one for lunch everyday because people are finicky eaters, and I don’t want them to make rude comments about my lunch. But oh, there was no hiding it now! I WAS FULLY WEARING THE CONCOCTION! I tried scrubbing it off, but the harder I tried to accomplish the goal of regaining the look of normalcy, the more I found myself smearing it all over. Laughing loudly, I poured water on me to get if off, but I was hopeless. My coworker took one look at me and mentioned I should go home.
A quick trip home, a new set of clothes, and all is well back at work. My “new outfit” must have looked bad because when I returned home, Michael thought Iwas sick and had vomited all over myself. I guess I’d rather the accident than the the alternative of being sick today.
Whatever will I do with myself?!?!?! And that, dear friends, is how I make even a Friday afternoon at work entertaining.
